Yay, the season has officially begun! And while I'd love to tell you I was sitting in the same room as Michael Schumacher, Felipe Massa, Fernando Alonso, Lewis Hamilton, and Jenson Button, it would be a lie.

I feel like such a noob. Everyone else in the media centre keeps leaping up and air-kissing people they've not seen since the start of the season, but I've not found anyone else looking lost that I can pretend to know.